Search terms are hilarious... Part 2 - AKA 'Google Feedback Loop'
Ok, well it's time to post another one of these... they're fun. There's also a feedback loop here that I find amusing. Google must love me. Oh, and my apologies, if you just searched Google and came here expecting to get a real answer. You should realize that someone else did the same thing at some point in the past and now we're laughing at them. And, now that you're here, in the future, we could be laughing at you!
*Note that any spelling errors, punctuation errors, or general stupidity in these search terms is the fault of someone else, and not me.
gluteus maximus pain after sitting in car a long timeWould this be from something kinda kewl like a stakeout, or were you just stalking your ex-girlfriend again?
WHAT DOES YOUR gluteus maximus look likeHah! Wouldn't you like to know! Freak.
can i disable a speaker in the mall where i work quicklyYou sound suspicious. Actually, you sound kinda fun too.
how to grow a bigger gluteus maximusDon't they have a pill for that?
rants about jury duty and serving hasslesHey! Go make your own, buddy! Don't be trying to steal them from others!
too stupid to avoid jury dutyWas that a self-description? This isn't a self-help site, dude.
gluteous men exercise (videos)I'm sorry. You need professional help. And, thanks to you, there are many people on the internets who now also need help because they saw this and had many disturbing images flash through their minds.
what can i say to make sure i don't get chosen for jury dutyAnything at least semi-crazy ought to work just fine. Can you drool creatively? Can you constantly keep brushing those freaking feathers off yourself while looking to see where they are coming from? How about lashing out violently at the spirits that constantly mock you?
excused from jury duty for depressionI'm sorry... they obviously thought that you needed to go home and close all the curtains and contemplate your sad life while surfing the internet.
jury duty how many times can missYou can miss 17 times, but whooooo!, on the 18th, you're going to jail, buddy! What? Isn't that what you discovered by googling this phrase?
consequences for not going to jury dutyFinally! A practical use for the internet! Finding out first what the consequences are for not going. Way to use the internet, dude!
how to disqualify yourself from jury dutyTry to wet yourself in the first 10 minutes and leave a rather large puddle... and then wet yourself again in 30 minutes. That should do it. (Remember to drink lots of water.)
avoiding jury dutyThere we go, right to the point. Next time, put '[Your Name] is avoiding jury duty', so we can tell who you are. And maybe we'll also call you up and shout 'JUROR DODGEE!' when we're bored.
how to use jury nullification to get out of jury duty*smack* Bad! Now, go sit next to the lawyers!
what does a gluteus maximus do for usApparently nothing! Who would have thought! You can just amputate yours. It'll save you some weight too.
pain in my Gluteus maximusYou should work harder to avoid the person causing this.
gluteus maximus seizureHint: Don't do this to that pretty woman you just met... they hate that.
gluteus maximus wifiWow... sitting at the Starbucks takes on a whole new meaning!
product to get a big gluteusI recommend: Dastardly Dan's Miracle Grow Tonic. Only $29.95 for a three month supply!
definition of the gluteus maximus in turms kids would understandOh, I assure you. The kids already understand it. But, apparently, there seems to be something that you're not quite grasping...
jury duty a duty or painOh! Wow! A multiple choice question in a search term! ... Oh boy, this is a hard one!
gluteus pain at nightLet me spell it out for you... try to remember to put all your Hot Wheels cars away before you go to bed.
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